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Be a monster.
Listen, just enough to respond plausibly.
Serve six or more meals a day.
Ask Pinterest.
Ask other parents.
Or don’t, actually.
Bundle everyone outside.
Always bring tissues.
Say “wow, look at that!”
Get out of bed, every day.
Challenge your fundamental identity.
Be jumped on, kicked and punched.
Make snacks.
Figure out what the world is all about, so you can tell them.
Apply plasters.
Tidy up.
Answer “where do fireworks come from?”
Conduct literally hundreds of bathtimes over the course of a year.
Reach the end of your tether.
Keep going.
You’ve got this.

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